Friday, February 19, 2016

With A Marriage Counselor Arlington TX Relationships Can Get A Second Chance

By Janet Wood


Sociology experts know that healthy families are the most important building blocks of healthy societies. Unfortunately, the divorce rate is still rising and each year numerous families are torn asunder when relationships sink. Divorce is always accompanied by a host of emotions and the process can cause great damage to all parties concerned, especially children. However, instead of simply terminating a relationship and by opting to see a marriage counselor Arlington TX couples may be able to save their families.

In the past, divorce was seen as a very serious matter and it was not all that easy to achieve. Couples living together and raising families without being married was unheard of. Modern society is much more tolerant and this increased tolerance is one of the reasons why divorce has become so common. It is most certainly no shame to divorce and the laws governing the termination of such relationships have relaxed.

Experienced relationship therapists say that too many couples divorce without trying to save their families. It is especially children that can suffer extreme trauma when their parents separate, especially if the separation is acrimonious. Many couples agree to therapy simply to try and spare their children the trauma of a divorce and if there is a chance to save such a family it is certainly worth the effort.

There are other excellent reasons for trying to save a relationship. Most couples work very hard for years to build a solid financial base for the family, to save for retirement and to make sure that the future is secure. Divorce can cause havoc with these carefully laid plans and can destroy the financial security of all family members.

Couples often fail to reconcile, even after agreeing to make the effort and in many cases it is because they do not obtain professional help. A professional therapist will help the couple to identify the causes of the break down in the relationship. The parties involved are seldom able to stand back and identify the relevant issues in an objective manner and to find a common middle ground.

It is important to choose a therapist with experience in handling the type of issues that caused the relationship to flounder. If the problem is sex, for example, a therapist with experience in that field would be better suited to help the couple. When agreeing to therapy neither party should expect the therapist to act as judge, to take side or to suggest solutions.

There some instances where it would actually be better to divorce. This is often the case when physical, emotional and substance abuse have become prevalent. If there is no reasonable hope that trust, open communication and mutual support can be established again, it may also be better to divorce. If staying together will subject children to ongoing trauma the relationship can only cause more harm.

Where feasible, everything possible should be done to save a relationship. In many cases a qualified therapist can provide invaluable assistance. If this cannot be done the couple should at least try to agree to an uncontested divorce. Contested divorced are messy, open to public scrutiny and expensive. Uncontested divorces are private and more dignified.




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