Hey, I've just got a quick note for you today on a subject that a lot of guys are curious about: How to talk to women. There's a lot of cool information I teach you, from routines to openers, conversation bridges, all kinds of great stuff to inject into your interactions with women. But in almost every single one-on-one coaching (and in hundreds of emails I get every day), one concern stands out more than any other.
It just feels hard, not easy at all and when that happens, you end up repelling women way more often than you will attract them. And if you make it a habit to repel women, where does that really get you?
When you feel like a conversation is really hard to get into or it just doesn't feel easy, most of the time that is due to a lack of RAPPORT with the person that you are speaking to. When you feel lots of rapport, even talking about the weather can be easy and kind of fun. So, this is something that you have to get right. You have to be able to make a woman feel rapport when she is with you and talking to you.
When someone seems nervous, or when they seem down, it makes talking to them a lot more difficult. When they are nervous, you can easily find that nervous feeling contagious and if you don't like that feeling, which most of us don't - it's going to make you want to get away. Happens a lot to women when they talk to really nervous guys.
They just want to get away. Someone who seems down is just going to drag you down, so again, it is just going to make you want to get away. However, if you have a lot of POSITIVE energy - now that is enticing and addicting and contagious as well. Only, this is the kind of energy that is going to make her want to stay around you.
A conversational bridge is a way of bringing up a topic that you want to steer the conversation towards. Let's say you know you want to talk about your passions and interests with a woman, and you've thought of a great way to bring it up and talk about it. And, let's say your passion is photography.You have a couple ways you could bring it up in conversation, like: "You know, I was just thinking as I'm looking at you that you would make a fantastic subject for photography. Have you ever thought about doing a sitting?" You could also bring it up without focusing on her by saying:
If you want to learn how to talk to women then you should pay very close attention to the conversation I just had with Angelica. She gave us all real insight into what women are looking for when men walk up to them. But there's also a lot she left out and I'm going to fill in some of that gap. Most attractive women are attention seekers.
They seek validation, some seek to have their egos strokes, and some of them actually want to genuinely someone that they feel they can connect with. It's far easier than you think, but first you have to unlearn what you have learned (I think I heard that in some movie somewhere).
How to speak with women I would cram all my notes on a piece of paper with facts, writing stuff everywhere, and in every direction. On the margins, sideways, whatever. Then, when it came time to study for a test on dates and names and memorized facts, I would just sit down with the page and cover up sections with my hand and try to recall the information.Well, we all did this in some way or another with our notes. What you don't realize is that you weren't learning the information as much as you were learning WHERE that information was on the paper. You got locked into recalling the information based on WHERE it was, not WHAT it was. So when you get a fact or information that you can't see on a piece of paper, you would forget it fast. (Which it's so easy to forget names. We're not paying attention to it enough the first time, and there's nothing to anchor it in our heads.)
If you walked up to a little kid and started talking to them would you be thinking any of these things? What about walking up to a friend? What about walking up to a 70 year old women? In your mind you view these things a harmless. You view them as having equal or less social value than you do, so it's far easier to approach them and start a conversation. Yet, if you see a very good-looking woman, your tongue gets tied up and your mind begins playing tricks on you.
It really is all in your head. Talking to women is as easy as talking to a kid, your friend, or that nice senior citizen. Once I stopped buying into some of societies ridiculous beliefs, such as a really attractive person is better than someone who is not (who judges this anyway?) or that a stranger can actually reject you, then I started having less fear and taking more action.
When a conversation is too boring or too mundane, there is little chance that you are really going to be able to spark some attraction, which is necessary if you are going to be able to get a date with her. Being able to take the conversation in a direction so that it becomes flirtatious is something that you need to be able to do. If you can't flirt, then you have to learn how to because flirting is a necessary skill that you need to have when you make conversation with a woman.
It just feels hard, not easy at all and when that happens, you end up repelling women way more often than you will attract them. And if you make it a habit to repel women, where does that really get you?
When you feel like a conversation is really hard to get into or it just doesn't feel easy, most of the time that is due to a lack of RAPPORT with the person that you are speaking to. When you feel lots of rapport, even talking about the weather can be easy and kind of fun. So, this is something that you have to get right. You have to be able to make a woman feel rapport when she is with you and talking to you.
When someone seems nervous, or when they seem down, it makes talking to them a lot more difficult. When they are nervous, you can easily find that nervous feeling contagious and if you don't like that feeling, which most of us don't - it's going to make you want to get away. Happens a lot to women when they talk to really nervous guys.
They just want to get away. Someone who seems down is just going to drag you down, so again, it is just going to make you want to get away. However, if you have a lot of POSITIVE energy - now that is enticing and addicting and contagious as well. Only, this is the kind of energy that is going to make her want to stay around you.
A conversational bridge is a way of bringing up a topic that you want to steer the conversation towards. Let's say you know you want to talk about your passions and interests with a woman, and you've thought of a great way to bring it up and talk about it. And, let's say your passion is photography.You have a couple ways you could bring it up in conversation, like: "You know, I was just thinking as I'm looking at you that you would make a fantastic subject for photography. Have you ever thought about doing a sitting?" You could also bring it up without focusing on her by saying:
If you want to learn how to talk to women then you should pay very close attention to the conversation I just had with Angelica. She gave us all real insight into what women are looking for when men walk up to them. But there's also a lot she left out and I'm going to fill in some of that gap. Most attractive women are attention seekers.
They seek validation, some seek to have their egos strokes, and some of them actually want to genuinely someone that they feel they can connect with. It's far easier than you think, but first you have to unlearn what you have learned (I think I heard that in some movie somewhere).
How to speak with women I would cram all my notes on a piece of paper with facts, writing stuff everywhere, and in every direction. On the margins, sideways, whatever. Then, when it came time to study for a test on dates and names and memorized facts, I would just sit down with the page and cover up sections with my hand and try to recall the information.Well, we all did this in some way or another with our notes. What you don't realize is that you weren't learning the information as much as you were learning WHERE that information was on the paper. You got locked into recalling the information based on WHERE it was, not WHAT it was. So when you get a fact or information that you can't see on a piece of paper, you would forget it fast. (Which it's so easy to forget names. We're not paying attention to it enough the first time, and there's nothing to anchor it in our heads.)
If you walked up to a little kid and started talking to them would you be thinking any of these things? What about walking up to a friend? What about walking up to a 70 year old women? In your mind you view these things a harmless. You view them as having equal or less social value than you do, so it's far easier to approach them and start a conversation. Yet, if you see a very good-looking woman, your tongue gets tied up and your mind begins playing tricks on you.
It really is all in your head. Talking to women is as easy as talking to a kid, your friend, or that nice senior citizen. Once I stopped buying into some of societies ridiculous beliefs, such as a really attractive person is better than someone who is not (who judges this anyway?) or that a stranger can actually reject you, then I started having less fear and taking more action.
When a conversation is too boring or too mundane, there is little chance that you are really going to be able to spark some attraction, which is necessary if you are going to be able to get a date with her. Being able to take the conversation in a direction so that it becomes flirtatious is something that you need to be able to do. If you can't flirt, then you have to learn how to because flirting is a necessary skill that you need to have when you make conversation with a woman.
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