There are discussions everywhere online, in English web circles and Chinese web circles both, on how the expectations of Chinese women is absurdly high. This is a phenomenon that isn't often found among Western women, and is usually considered 'spoiled' in the West. What is an inadequate trait in the Western world has been adopted and evolved by Chinese women to become a relatively common occurrence. There are varying levels of this phenomena but it is important to be able to identify and take care of it when dating Chinese women.
Why Are Chinese Women's Expectations So excessive?There are various arguments about why Chinese women generally have this sense of entitlement and there are two that really stick out to me.
The first reason is the environment Chinese women grew up in raised their expectations. Nowadays, most Chinese women grew up in a single-child household under Mao's One-Child Policy. They had two parents giving them their undivided attention, and indeed received all of the attention they wanted from birth until their early adulthood.
The second reason is a post-Mao era "vacuum" surrounding the role of girls in a modern world. Women wound up with much more power than they previously had but didn't exactly know what to do with it.
That is where we get many strong and independent Chinese females who emulate Western women. The matter, however, is that their role is still very ambiguous, and more and more Chinese girls desire to emulate the 'kawaii' Japanese high school girl, or the typical poor-but-adorable girls of K-drama. Either way, the end result is pretty similar, Chinese women expect the world of their better half.
Sajiao is an interesting concept in Chinese that roughly translates into having a tantrum. Sajiao is when a girl (or a boy) throws an outburst and whines and complains to obtain what she wants. It is almost always a playful act, but can also reflect someone who is legitimately spoiled. If you date Chinese women, you would run into a sajiao fit at least once.
How do you go about appealing to a Chinese woman's expectations?Together with knowing that a lot is going to be expected of you, you have to throw out your own sense of entitlement. Chinese women are usually very polite and courteous, but don't expect a great deal of thank-you's or gestures in return for the things you do. Even something like helping her move apartments, which is quite an ordeal, may not get you a considerable amount of appreciation.
Chinese women just won't necessarily verbally recognize the things you do for her, she takes them as a given. Just remain respectful, because while she may not outwardly express her appreciation, she definitely tallies up everything you do on her behalf.
Why Are Chinese Women's Expectations So excessive?There are various arguments about why Chinese women generally have this sense of entitlement and there are two that really stick out to me.
The first reason is the environment Chinese women grew up in raised their expectations. Nowadays, most Chinese women grew up in a single-child household under Mao's One-Child Policy. They had two parents giving them their undivided attention, and indeed received all of the attention they wanted from birth until their early adulthood.
The second reason is a post-Mao era "vacuum" surrounding the role of girls in a modern world. Women wound up with much more power than they previously had but didn't exactly know what to do with it.
That is where we get many strong and independent Chinese females who emulate Western women. The matter, however, is that their role is still very ambiguous, and more and more Chinese girls desire to emulate the 'kawaii' Japanese high school girl, or the typical poor-but-adorable girls of K-drama. Either way, the end result is pretty similar, Chinese women expect the world of their better half.
Sajiao is an interesting concept in Chinese that roughly translates into having a tantrum. Sajiao is when a girl (or a boy) throws an outburst and whines and complains to obtain what she wants. It is almost always a playful act, but can also reflect someone who is legitimately spoiled. If you date Chinese women, you would run into a sajiao fit at least once.
How do you go about appealing to a Chinese woman's expectations?Together with knowing that a lot is going to be expected of you, you have to throw out your own sense of entitlement. Chinese women are usually very polite and courteous, but don't expect a great deal of thank-you's or gestures in return for the things you do. Even something like helping her move apartments, which is quite an ordeal, may not get you a considerable amount of appreciation.
Chinese women just won't necessarily verbally recognize the things you do for her, she takes them as a given. Just remain respectful, because while she may not outwardly express her appreciation, she definitely tallies up everything you do on her behalf.
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